Just in time

I was almost ready to throw in the towel. Call it quits. Give up. You see I'd been trying to keep my blood sugars under control. I'm running, training for a half marathon next month, I check my blood sugar often (usually at least 8 times a day), and I count my carbs, use my bolus wizard on my pump, all of it. Everything the doctors tell me, everything I know I should do after living with diabetes for the past twelve years. But still my blood sugars were just crazy. I even started doing basal rate checks (fasting and checking my blood sugar every two hours). But it felt like no matter what I did, my blood sugars were unpredictable, and unpredictably high. Not my normal post-meal high, or "explainable" highs, but random ones that were in the 300's even a few up into 400. I'd had it. The thought had crossed my mind... why even bother. I work so hard, and still I don't get it. There felt like no explanation. No reason for these high blood sugars and I was tired of trying with no success. Why bother with all of the work when it felt like it wasn’t helping?

Then a package arrived. The kids were excited, who was it for? What was in it? Unfortunately, for me, packages are no longer exciting. It's usually diabetes related supplies and more stuff to clutter up my closet. This time it was a mini-med box. I opened it up ready to find the usual boxes of infusion sets and pump reservoirs, but this time it was just one box of new infusion sets and a letter. I quickly read over the letter...

Medtronic Diabetes is recalling Quick-set infusion sets that have lot numbers starting with the number "8"
These infusion sets are used with MiniMed Paradigm® insulin pumps. This decision was made because we estimate that a small percentage of "Lot 8" Quick-set infusion sets may not work properly.

I ran back to my stash of infusion sets... sure enough. I'd been using lot number 8! I continued reading...

Scenario 2 - Non-Delivery of Insulin

During priming, clogged vents may prevent the reservoir compartment from equalizing air pressure. As a result, the insulin pump may appear to be properly primed when it is not. Once the infusion set is inserted, this could lead to a period of non-delivery of insulin, which can potentially result in a hyperglycemic event following an infusion set change.
Since this occurs closely following an infusion set change, it may be different than the typical high blood sugars that many people experience as part of their routine diabetes management.

That was it! I hadn't been getting any insulin for periods of time because of this clogged vent. Finally an explanation. It wasn't my fault after all. In fact, it was totally out of my control. That's sometimes the trouble. This disease is so much about control, but there is so much out of my control, even when I'm doing my damnedest to manage it all. So, thank you mini-med for making it not my fault. Maybe next time I'll call and ask rather than trying to figure it all out on my own, and hopefully before I decide to just give up.

So I’ve sent back all my “lot 8” infusion sets, and things have been better. Not perfect, they never are, but better. And “managing” all this feels doable again.